Wednesday, December 10, 2008
If we let the auto industry fail by denying a bailout...
...converting the United States to the metric system will be wayyyyy easier.
Friday, November 21, 2008
What is a doula? The Today Show needs to do more research!
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/27808452/
This is the link to the Today Show piece on doulas. While the MSNBC article alongside was nice, I was really disappointed with the video segment. It portrays doulas as a luxury (expensive) and an annoyance to doctors and even the root of complications with the labor!!!! The show staff did a poor job researching doulas and neglected to give unbiased information. All of the doulas I know are furious about this!
My doula organization, PDX Doulas in Portland, Oregon, not only provides FREE doula services, but part of our mission is to foster an environment of cooperation with hospital staff. Most of the nurses and doctors, and all of the midwives LOVE walking into their patients' rooms to find one of us there. They see us as an invaluable part of the family's experience in labor and delivery.
We would never tell the doctor what the mother should or shouldn't do. When an intervention (induction, pain meds, episiotomy, etc) is offered, it is our job as advocates to remind the mother to ask questions so that she can make an informed decision HERSELF (or with her family). We are trained specifically to not speak for the mother/family, only to help the mother feel like she has made the decisions rather than have had things done TO her with little or no understanding. One of the best ways to ensure that a mama comes away from her birth with a positive memory is to help her feel that she was involved in the courses taken. Even if mama ends up with four IV's and a c-section, if she was involved every step of the way, she is more at peace with the birth in hindsight.
We don't tell mamas to refuse meds, but offer alternative coping techniques to try first if they want. We help with breathing, visualizations, and massage relaxation techniques. We show them different positions to try to help with discomfort and labor progress. We draw warm baths for them to relax in. We bring cool cloths for their foreheads and hold the basin when they vomit. We encourage and cheer them on, boosting their self confidence. When the doctor or nurse offers suggestions, we listen attentively and if the mama seems unsure, we ask if the family has questions or if they could have a moment to talk as a family and decide. If the suggestion is something that for the mother or baby's safety, they can't delay long or refuse, we still ask for a moment so the family can take a few breaths and accept the deviation from the birth they hoped for.
The actions of doulas that cause hesitation or bad blood with hospital staff are often uncertified doulas. Even if they are certified, they would promptly be fired from our group. It is those few doulas that give the rest of us a bad reputation. When we hear of hospitals banning doulas from the birth rooms, we are dismayed and frustruated with the doulas that have acted unprofessionally. Please don't judge every doula by the actions of a small group. Recognize that in every profession, there are practitioners that you should not hire.
As a mama-to-be, please interview multiple doulas to protect yourself from one who might force her own ideals onto your birth, or act unprofessionally with your healthcare providers. Doulas are supposed to help you have the best birth according to you and your family's preferences. And they should also be able to adapt to necessary changes in the birth plan as outlined by your doctor.
Thank you for taking the time to hear my side. I hope you will make up your own minds about doulas. DONA.org has statistics on the benefits of doulas if you would like more information.
This is the link to the Today Show piece on doulas. While the MSNBC article alongside was nice, I was really disappointed with the video segment. It portrays doulas as a luxury (expensive) and an annoyance to doctors and even the root of complications with the labor!!!! The show staff did a poor job researching doulas and neglected to give unbiased information. All of the doulas I know are furious about this!
My doula organization, PDX Doulas in Portland, Oregon, not only provides FREE doula services, but part of our mission is to foster an environment of cooperation with hospital staff. Most of the nurses and doctors, and all of the midwives LOVE walking into their patients' rooms to find one of us there. They see us as an invaluable part of the family's experience in labor and delivery.
We would never tell the doctor what the mother should or shouldn't do. When an intervention (induction, pain meds, episiotomy, etc) is offered, it is our job as advocates to remind the mother to ask questions so that she can make an informed decision HERSELF (or with her family). We are trained specifically to not speak for the mother/family, only to help the mother feel like she has made the decisions rather than have had things done TO her with little or no understanding. One of the best ways to ensure that a mama comes away from her birth with a positive memory is to help her feel that she was involved in the courses taken. Even if mama ends up with four IV's and a c-section, if she was involved every step of the way, she is more at peace with the birth in hindsight.
We don't tell mamas to refuse meds, but offer alternative coping techniques to try first if they want. We help with breathing, visualizations, and massage relaxation techniques. We show them different positions to try to help with discomfort and labor progress. We draw warm baths for them to relax in. We bring cool cloths for their foreheads and hold the basin when they vomit. We encourage and cheer them on, boosting their self confidence. When the doctor or nurse offers suggestions, we listen attentively and if the mama seems unsure, we ask if the family has questions or if they could have a moment to talk as a family and decide. If the suggestion is something that for the mother or baby's safety, they can't delay long or refuse, we still ask for a moment so the family can take a few breaths and accept the deviation from the birth they hoped for.
The actions of doulas that cause hesitation or bad blood with hospital staff are often uncertified doulas. Even if they are certified, they would promptly be fired from our group. It is those few doulas that give the rest of us a bad reputation. When we hear of hospitals banning doulas from the birth rooms, we are dismayed and frustruated with the doulas that have acted unprofessionally. Please don't judge every doula by the actions of a small group. Recognize that in every profession, there are practitioners that you should not hire.
As a mama-to-be, please interview multiple doulas to protect yourself from one who might force her own ideals onto your birth, or act unprofessionally with your healthcare providers. Doulas are supposed to help you have the best birth according to you and your family's preferences. And they should also be able to adapt to necessary changes in the birth plan as outlined by your doctor.
Thank you for taking the time to hear my side. I hope you will make up your own minds about doulas. DONA.org has statistics on the benefits of doulas if you would like more information.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Thursday, November 13, 2008
My bike and I fought the Portland Streetcar rails and the rails won...
Or did they?
So I was riding my bike downtown, minding my own, when the Portland Streetcar rails decided that they needed to interrupt my bike lane in a parallel-and-inside-my-lane fashion. Que peligro! So I dipped between the rails so I wouldn't have to ride in the 8 inches between the right rail and the curb. No problem. But when the bike lane widened and the rails were no longer in it, I tried to get back over the right rail and my tire slipped down in the track. I proceeded to fly forward (and as sideways as I could manage midair) right off my stuck bike and landed sprawled on the street. It was like a wheee!, then a whump! with a little skidding thrown in. My friend stopped behind me, rather than running into me (thanks!) and a lady dropped whatever big thing she was carrying and ran over to help.
I pretty much jumped right up (afraid of cars) and snatched my bike out of the track/road and scooted the whole party to the curb behind a parked car. I couldnt figure out why nothing hurt. I thought maybe I was just still shocked. The lady with the package asked me like 6 times if I was alright, even though I answered her every time. It must have looked really bad. I guess there were a few feet between my body and the bike by the end of it. Finally I told her I was just rattled but I'd be fine, and she picked up her crazy huge thing and walked off.
Thank goodness for my new gloves that I was wearing for the first time, cuz my hands would have been bloody and gross without them. They're pretty well broken in, now. I am sooooo glad they were padded palms! Also, a thank you to my jeans, that bore the brunt of the skidding of my knee and shin - I would be road-rashy without you. Actually, the only thing I'm feeling now is a stubbed big toe. And it's minor.
On top of my body luck, my bike came out of it amazingly well. Ordinarily, in a fight with streetcar rails, a bike's wheel will be bent and rendered useless. But my superbike came out of it with a few scuffs to the paint and the front brakes bumped off center. A little hand tap and the brakes were fixed. I really can't believe how lucky this whole thing was, especially for how bad my friend behind me said it looked.
Phew!
Also, you should visit velociraptorz.org for laughs (but seriously.) and change.gov for inspiration and patriotism.
So I was riding my bike downtown, minding my own, when the Portland Streetcar rails decided that they needed to interrupt my bike lane in a parallel-and-inside-my-lane fashion. Que peligro! So I dipped between the rails so I wouldn't have to ride in the 8 inches between the right rail and the curb. No problem. But when the bike lane widened and the rails were no longer in it, I tried to get back over the right rail and my tire slipped down in the track. I proceeded to fly forward (and as sideways as I could manage midair) right off my stuck bike and landed sprawled on the street. It was like a wheee!, then a whump! with a little skidding thrown in. My friend stopped behind me, rather than running into me (thanks!) and a lady dropped whatever big thing she was carrying and ran over to help.
I pretty much jumped right up (afraid of cars) and snatched my bike out of the track/road and scooted the whole party to the curb behind a parked car. I couldnt figure out why nothing hurt. I thought maybe I was just still shocked. The lady with the package asked me like 6 times if I was alright, even though I answered her every time. It must have looked really bad. I guess there were a few feet between my body and the bike by the end of it. Finally I told her I was just rattled but I'd be fine, and she picked up her crazy huge thing and walked off.
Thank goodness for my new gloves that I was wearing for the first time, cuz my hands would have been bloody and gross without them. They're pretty well broken in, now. I am sooooo glad they were padded palms! Also, a thank you to my jeans, that bore the brunt of the skidding of my knee and shin - I would be road-rashy without you. Actually, the only thing I'm feeling now is a stubbed big toe. And it's minor.
On top of my body luck, my bike came out of it amazingly well. Ordinarily, in a fight with streetcar rails, a bike's wheel will be bent and rendered useless. But my superbike came out of it with a few scuffs to the paint and the front brakes bumped off center. A little hand tap and the brakes were fixed. I really can't believe how lucky this whole thing was, especially for how bad my friend behind me said it looked.
Phew!
Also, you should visit velociraptorz.org for laughs (but seriously.) and change.gov for inspiration and patriotism.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
and dirt don't hurt
Welcome to 5769, I hope everyone had a sweet new year and is happily atoned. I've gotten my year off to a good start by actively strengthening my new friendships and laying out in the mud at ultimate pickup for the first time in months (shame on me). Get dirty! In my ongoing pursuit of getting dirty, I went climbing at Carver Ridge with some frisbee buddies and managed to get my own blood in my chalk bag. Don't worry mom, it was just a scratch. I think, actually, that I got more injured walking along the trail than actually up on the rock. I slipped in the mud and my hand went right into a jagged wood stump instead of all the soft mud under the rest of me. I've got a nice gash on the palm of my hand, now. Of course none of the seven of us brought first aid stuff. We did manage to scrape together the corner of a napkin and a strip of athletic tape. Hardcore.
After a few hours of messing around on the cold rock (y'know, it's really hard to grip with numb fingers!) half of us drove 45min to Bagby Hot Springs to soak out our muscles. It was a little crowded, but we didn't have to wait too long before we could get in the water. Mmm. I'm glad we did that. I think I'd have been much more sore the next day if I hadn't soaked.
On another note, I'm working on my school applications again. I'm sending out juju to the OHSU admissions people to get it right this year and accept me outright. In January I'll remind all of you to help out with that. I promise to shower before my interview. And even use shampoo!
After a few hours of messing around on the cold rock (y'know, it's really hard to grip with numb fingers!) half of us drove 45min to Bagby Hot Springs to soak out our muscles. It was a little crowded, but we didn't have to wait too long before we could get in the water. Mmm. I'm glad we did that. I think I'd have been much more sore the next day if I hadn't soaked.
On another note, I'm working on my school applications again. I'm sending out juju to the OHSU admissions people to get it right this year and accept me outright. In January I'll remind all of you to help out with that. I promise to shower before my interview. And even use shampoo!
Monday, October 6, 2008
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Road Trip!
I have had a really wonderful week. Lots of love and friendship building, very good stuff.
My friend Russia and I drove down to San Francisco last Wednesday for an impromptu (for me, anyway) adventure. Russia had two meetings with some apparell companies to scout out potential fashion jobs and invited me to make a fun trip out of it with her. Wednesday night we were graciously hosted by my old Pittsburgh comrade K2. Thursday morning, after breakfast out together, Rush and I drove to Brisbane, CA for her first meeting. Her contact ended up taking both of us out to a lavish Dim Sum lunch and then showing us the cutting room in the factory. It was so neat! The cutters use a jigsaw-looking thing to cut out patterns in stacks of fabric. What we thought would take an hour ended up taking half the day, not to mention driving back into the city afterward, finding parking, and catching a bus to Fisherman's Wharf where we fully intended to rent bikes to traverse the GG bridge that afternoon. But... of course we managed to catch the right bus in the wrong direction. This became the story of our lives there in SF, we just couldn't get our public transit acts together!
Anyway by the time we made it to the bike rental shop, it was 6:15pm and they closed at 7. There was no way we'd make the trip in under 45minutes, and I didnt want to have to rent the bikes overnight, so we resolved to try again Friday. Instead we wandered the wharf for a bit, visiting the resident sea lions at Pier 39. Apparently a whole huge group (looked like about 15 bulls, each with their harem) moved in and set up shop at the end of Pier 39 a number of years ago. They were all pretty much laying there in piles on the docks, occasionally snorting or rolling over. I wondered if they were as interested in and confused by the flock of humans arching for a glance and a photo as we were for them. Russia and I walked back to the bus stop clapping and making sea lion noises loudly. I think we scared a group of tourists in front of us, they whipped around, thinking we were real sea lions. Oh well.
We had dinner at a snazzy vegan restaurant recommended to me by my good buddy Jenn - Millenium. Mmm tasty! Dinner was followed by meeting up with K2 and Jenna (another 'Burgh pal) for beers. We finally tucked ourselves in to our little hostel bunk beds in the wee hours.
Friday we had yet another transit fiasco. First we drove forever to San Leandro (or as Russia put it - San Leonardo) for her 10:30am meeting at North Face. By the way, the SF Bay Bridge goes through and island halfway along the bridge... bridge-tunnel-bridge. I thought it was way cool. But I am dorky like that. Okay back to the craziness. The receptionist informed us that Russia's meeting had been moved to 3pm (bike time) and that the contact had emailed Russia this information. Meanwhile Russia had been leaving this woman voicemails left and right to confirm and never got a return call. Anyway, we decided that driving was a pain and parking out there was free and probably safer. So we ditched the car and took the BART back into the city.
We then caught the right bus in the right direction (finally) and rented our bikes (finally). The whole time, I wished I had brought my own bike, because these bikes were kind of lame. They were like a weird cross between a mtn bike and a cruiser. I dont know, but I felt like I was cramped up in a weird upright position and it made it incredibly difficult to climb hills (hello! San Francisco!) I never had to get off and push, though my shoulders were killing me from the strange position. Before too long we reached our goal, the Golden Gate Bridge (which is red)! There was so much fog we could barely see the bridge while we were on the dang thing. But it was a cool effect, revealing itself bit-by-bit as we pedaled on. At the Sausalito end, we took photos and watched more fog literally roll in over the hilltops. We turned around and rode back, speeding to get the bikes back and return to North Face via all sorts of public transit by 3pm. Well it ended up being more like 5, and Russia went in while I dozed in her car. Afterward, we returned to the hostel where Rush took a short nap and I lay listening to the steel drum player outside go through the same three songs again and again. We splashed our faces and picked up some quick late-night Thai food. Then we tried to get a bus to a house party K2 had invited us to, though we ended up walking most of the way because the city blocks along which ran the bus we wanted were too scary to stand and wait at 11pm. At the party I was reunited with still more Pittsburgh friends Jamo and Vanessa. Who knew I knew so many people in SF? The party migrated to a nearby bar, but the local flavor on the sidewalk was so interesting that Russia, K2, Nina, and I never made it inside. We made friends with a little firecracker of a drunk lady named Leanore. Russia and I walked the whole way back to the hostel since we didn't know which buses ran late. We collapsed into our bunk beds safe and sound.
Saturday morning we went to a great farmer's market in Fisherman's Wharf (sorry we were so late K2!!!) We had fresh farmy fruit for breakfast, and strolled towards downtown with a pit stop to lie in the grass for a while. We went to the fortune cookie factory in Chinatown (where else?) were we got free samples and then bought a bag. The factory was a tiny room with two big machines dispensing batter into miniature griddles which pressed together and revolved through a horseshoe-shaped oven - arriving in front of the cookie-makers who folded the fortunes inside. Two machines, two cookie ladies, and one man handling the sales to all the gawkers. Afterwards, the three of us had lunch around the corner at a (you guessed it) Chinese restaurant.
Next we went to a spectacular private rooftop concert/party. A handful of great artists played and sang while we sat on the rooftop, enjoying the sunset. It was truly a special afternoon. I was grateful to Russia for agreeing to stay Saturday instead of heading to the redwoods that morning. And she was grateful to me for agreeing to go back to Portland on Monday intead of Sunday to allot for a camping trip through the redwoods, which she had never seen. One artist at the party was especially impressive - Kelly McFarling. Check her out if you ever get a chance.
Russia and I had dinner and spent some time with Jenna and Nina and Jenna's apt. We later slept at K2's.
We dragged ourselves out of bed as early as we could, after ignorning multiple alarms, said goodbye and thanks to K2, and were on our merry way. We took 101 North, across the GG Bridge (still fogalicious) and up into the redwoods. We got out of the car a few times in various redwood groves to appreciate their size, hike deeper in away from the road, and eat sandwiches we got at Calico's in Garberville. Great sandwich shop, btw. We were so overheated, that at one point in northern Humbolt, we pulled over and scrambled down to what I think was still the Eel River. We tried to stay out of view from the roads, since we didn't have swimsuits, but ahhh that cold water felt great we barely cared! Russia decided that she'd rather camp on the beach than in the redwoods, so we powered on north just past Crescent City, turned west on some tiny street near Fort Dick, and parked when the road ended in sand. We ate a can of chili while we sat on a big piece of driftwood and watched the last tiny bit of light slip down behind the ocean. We set up my tent on the sand, out of high tide's way, and zipped in for the night. I was nervous because I've never camped somewhere without permission, but only the wind and the crashing waves had anything to say about it.
On Monday we motored on to Portland, where I dropped Russia off at work and went home myself to prepare my addition to that evening's potluck and pack my doula bag. Whew!
p.s. photos from this trip on flickr coming soon
My friend Russia and I drove down to San Francisco last Wednesday for an impromptu (for me, anyway) adventure. Russia had two meetings with some apparell companies to scout out potential fashion jobs and invited me to make a fun trip out of it with her. Wednesday night we were graciously hosted by my old Pittsburgh comrade K2. Thursday morning, after breakfast out together, Rush and I drove to Brisbane, CA for her first meeting. Her contact ended up taking both of us out to a lavish Dim Sum lunch and then showing us the cutting room in the factory. It was so neat! The cutters use a jigsaw-looking thing to cut out patterns in stacks of fabric. What we thought would take an hour ended up taking half the day, not to mention driving back into the city afterward, finding parking, and catching a bus to Fisherman's Wharf where we fully intended to rent bikes to traverse the GG bridge that afternoon. But... of course we managed to catch the right bus in the wrong direction. This became the story of our lives there in SF, we just couldn't get our public transit acts together!
Anyway by the time we made it to the bike rental shop, it was 6:15pm and they closed at 7. There was no way we'd make the trip in under 45minutes, and I didnt want to have to rent the bikes overnight, so we resolved to try again Friday. Instead we wandered the wharf for a bit, visiting the resident sea lions at Pier 39. Apparently a whole huge group (looked like about 15 bulls, each with their harem) moved in and set up shop at the end of Pier 39 a number of years ago. They were all pretty much laying there in piles on the docks, occasionally snorting or rolling over. I wondered if they were as interested in and confused by the flock of humans arching for a glance and a photo as we were for them. Russia and I walked back to the bus stop clapping and making sea lion noises loudly. I think we scared a group of tourists in front of us, they whipped around, thinking we were real sea lions. Oh well.
We had dinner at a snazzy vegan restaurant recommended to me by my good buddy Jenn - Millenium. Mmm tasty! Dinner was followed by meeting up with K2 and Jenna (another 'Burgh pal) for beers. We finally tucked ourselves in to our little hostel bunk beds in the wee hours.
Friday we had yet another transit fiasco. First we drove forever to San Leandro (or as Russia put it - San Leonardo) for her 10:30am meeting at North Face. By the way, the SF Bay Bridge goes through and island halfway along the bridge... bridge-tunnel-bridge. I thought it was way cool. But I am dorky like that. Okay back to the craziness. The receptionist informed us that Russia's meeting had been moved to 3pm (bike time) and that the contact had emailed Russia this information. Meanwhile Russia had been leaving this woman voicemails left and right to confirm and never got a return call. Anyway, we decided that driving was a pain and parking out there was free and probably safer. So we ditched the car and took the BART back into the city.
We then caught the right bus in the right direction (finally) and rented our bikes (finally). The whole time, I wished I had brought my own bike, because these bikes were kind of lame. They were like a weird cross between a mtn bike and a cruiser. I dont know, but I felt like I was cramped up in a weird upright position and it made it incredibly difficult to climb hills (hello! San Francisco!) I never had to get off and push, though my shoulders were killing me from the strange position. Before too long we reached our goal, the Golden Gate Bridge (which is red)! There was so much fog we could barely see the bridge while we were on the dang thing. But it was a cool effect, revealing itself bit-by-bit as we pedaled on. At the Sausalito end, we took photos and watched more fog literally roll in over the hilltops. We turned around and rode back, speeding to get the bikes back and return to North Face via all sorts of public transit by 3pm. Well it ended up being more like 5, and Russia went in while I dozed in her car. Afterward, we returned to the hostel where Rush took a short nap and I lay listening to the steel drum player outside go through the same three songs again and again. We splashed our faces and picked up some quick late-night Thai food. Then we tried to get a bus to a house party K2 had invited us to, though we ended up walking most of the way because the city blocks along which ran the bus we wanted were too scary to stand and wait at 11pm. At the party I was reunited with still more Pittsburgh friends Jamo and Vanessa. Who knew I knew so many people in SF? The party migrated to a nearby bar, but the local flavor on the sidewalk was so interesting that Russia, K2, Nina, and I never made it inside. We made friends with a little firecracker of a drunk lady named Leanore. Russia and I walked the whole way back to the hostel since we didn't know which buses ran late. We collapsed into our bunk beds safe and sound.
Saturday morning we went to a great farmer's market in Fisherman's Wharf (sorry we were so late K2!!!) We had fresh farmy fruit for breakfast, and strolled towards downtown with a pit stop to lie in the grass for a while. We went to the fortune cookie factory in Chinatown (where else?) were we got free samples and then bought a bag. The factory was a tiny room with two big machines dispensing batter into miniature griddles which pressed together and revolved through a horseshoe-shaped oven - arriving in front of the cookie-makers who folded the fortunes inside. Two machines, two cookie ladies, and one man handling the sales to all the gawkers. Afterwards, the three of us had lunch around the corner at a (you guessed it) Chinese restaurant.
Next we went to a spectacular private rooftop concert/party. A handful of great artists played and sang while we sat on the rooftop, enjoying the sunset. It was truly a special afternoon. I was grateful to Russia for agreeing to stay Saturday instead of heading to the redwoods that morning. And she was grateful to me for agreeing to go back to Portland on Monday intead of Sunday to allot for a camping trip through the redwoods, which she had never seen. One artist at the party was especially impressive - Kelly McFarling. Check her out if you ever get a chance.
Russia and I had dinner and spent some time with Jenna and Nina and Jenna's apt. We later slept at K2's.
We dragged ourselves out of bed as early as we could, after ignorning multiple alarms, said goodbye and thanks to K2, and were on our merry way. We took 101 North, across the GG Bridge (still fogalicious) and up into the redwoods. We got out of the car a few times in various redwood groves to appreciate their size, hike deeper in away from the road, and eat sandwiches we got at Calico's in Garberville. Great sandwich shop, btw. We were so overheated, that at one point in northern Humbolt, we pulled over and scrambled down to what I think was still the Eel River. We tried to stay out of view from the roads, since we didn't have swimsuits, but ahhh that cold water felt great we barely cared! Russia decided that she'd rather camp on the beach than in the redwoods, so we powered on north just past Crescent City, turned west on some tiny street near Fort Dick, and parked when the road ended in sand. We ate a can of chili while we sat on a big piece of driftwood and watched the last tiny bit of light slip down behind the ocean. We set up my tent on the sand, out of high tide's way, and zipped in for the night. I was nervous because I've never camped somewhere without permission, but only the wind and the crashing waves had anything to say about it.
On Monday we motored on to Portland, where I dropped Russia off at work and went home myself to prepare my addition to that evening's potluck and pack my doula bag. Whew!
p.s. photos from this trip on flickr coming soon
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Mother knows best
I think I have to pass on Colorado.
I've been in Oregon for one year, two weeks, and two days. In that time I've had a "real job" for about 6 weeks. Granted I quit it thinking I was about to move right into another job which I planned to hold until the end of next June. But still... this year pretty much has been a vacation. Why do I think I need to escape it for a different vacation?
Oh yeah, because I've been so stressed out and depressed that my grand plan didn't quite work out that it really doesn't feel like vacation. I'm in a gorgeous place with nothing but opportunity and what am I doing with it? Feeling useless and choosing to sit mindlessly at my computer more often than truly appreciating my temporary freedom from responsibility.
Why is it that when we are unemployed we stress about finding a job the entire time, and then when we get a job we regret not taking advantage of that free time to travel, camp, and play? Well I can't say that I haven't been fully ignoring that. I do play a lot. And I've camped a bit. But I haven't been able to really let go and enjoy it because there's always that pervasive anxiety about not working.
Oy.
It's funny to hear different people's reactions and advice. The younger they are, the more enthusiastically they say "Go for it!" But my mom is the one that knows me deep down. She called me out on my fears. She pointed out truths that I had been unable to admit even to myself. And she's right.
I need to stay in Portland. I moved 2,575 miles from home to follow a dream. I can't let my fears take over. I must not lose focus on that dream.
I've been in Oregon for one year, two weeks, and two days. In that time I've had a "real job" for about 6 weeks. Granted I quit it thinking I was about to move right into another job which I planned to hold until the end of next June. But still... this year pretty much has been a vacation. Why do I think I need to escape it for a different vacation?
Oh yeah, because I've been so stressed out and depressed that my grand plan didn't quite work out that it really doesn't feel like vacation. I'm in a gorgeous place with nothing but opportunity and what am I doing with it? Feeling useless and choosing to sit mindlessly at my computer more often than truly appreciating my temporary freedom from responsibility.
Why is it that when we are unemployed we stress about finding a job the entire time, and then when we get a job we regret not taking advantage of that free time to travel, camp, and play? Well I can't say that I haven't been fully ignoring that. I do play a lot. And I've camped a bit. But I haven't been able to really let go and enjoy it because there's always that pervasive anxiety about not working.
Oy.
It's funny to hear different people's reactions and advice. The younger they are, the more enthusiastically they say "Go for it!" But my mom is the one that knows me deep down. She called me out on my fears. She pointed out truths that I had been unable to admit even to myself. And she's right.
I need to stay in Portland. I moved 2,575 miles from home to follow a dream. I can't let my fears take over. I must not lose focus on that dream.
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Adventure is nipping my heels...
I've just been offered a job...
...in Crested Butte.
And I want to jump at it, yes yes yes! Really there are only two things holding me back. Well more than two actually, but just two big ones.
1.) I need to maintain OR residency to afford school WHEN I get in this year. So I have to convince my wonderful landpeople to let me sublet my apartment (which I rent technically on a month-to-month basis) and find storage for most of my crap. Or just find storage for all of my crap and risk not finding a new apartment that's anywhere near as awesome a situation as what I've got now if I have to give it up.
2.) I'm attached to my doula group and don't want to let them down. And I don't want to miss out on all the births I would certainly get over the winter as opposed to maybe one or two private clients I might be able to find in CB. I need to prove my commitment to reproductive health so school will love me more than last year.
Pros:
I still don't have a real job here in Portland and there aren't any solid prospects since I'm being so picky. I'd rent a room and spend less than I'm spending now. I'd have a guaranteed job with people I know and trust and respect. I'd be living in paradise. I could celebrate the holidays with my sister, which I haven't done in 4 years. NO RAIN. If I do have to let go of my current Portland apartment, I can get a new one with more storage space, natural light, and room for a desk (cuz I'll be a scholarly type by summertime!!).
How did Kerouac put it? My feet are getting itchy.
Advice!!!!Please!!
...in Crested Butte.
And I want to jump at it, yes yes yes! Really there are only two things holding me back. Well more than two actually, but just two big ones.
1.) I need to maintain OR residency to afford school WHEN I get in this year. So I have to convince my wonderful landpeople to let me sublet my apartment (which I rent technically on a month-to-month basis) and find storage for most of my crap. Or just find storage for all of my crap and risk not finding a new apartment that's anywhere near as awesome a situation as what I've got now if I have to give it up.
2.) I'm attached to my doula group and don't want to let them down. And I don't want to miss out on all the births I would certainly get over the winter as opposed to maybe one or two private clients I might be able to find in CB. I need to prove my commitment to reproductive health so school will love me more than last year.
Pros:
I still don't have a real job here in Portland and there aren't any solid prospects since I'm being so picky. I'd rent a room and spend less than I'm spending now. I'd have a guaranteed job with people I know and trust and respect. I'd be living in paradise. I could celebrate the holidays with my sister, which I haven't done in 4 years. NO RAIN. If I do have to let go of my current Portland apartment, I can get a new one with more storage space, natural light, and room for a desk (cuz I'll be a scholarly type by summertime!!).
How did Kerouac put it? My feet are getting itchy.
Advice!!!!Please!!
Monday, September 8, 2008
and yet... somehow not horrible
As I clicked the link to Dr. Horrible's Sing-along-Blog I winced, assuming it would be a dumb waste of time. However, I was more than pleasantly surprised. In fact, I thoroughly enjoyed it and even laughed aloud. SciFi mixed with superheroes mixed with singing!
Neil Patrick Harris did a great job as the awkward villain and how can I not love Nathan Fillion from the Firefly series?
Honestly worth the 45minutes!
Neil Patrick Harris did a great job as the awkward villain and how can I not love Nathan Fillion from the Firefly series?
Honestly worth the 45minutes!
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
Gumby-girl
I've been into this new activity/exercise/play time called acro-yoga. It's a combination of partner yoga, acrobatics, and Thai massage. Verrrryyyy cool. I'm getting stronger and stretchier every day.
Check out my flickr page: these photos!
btw: that's me in the orange shirt, in case you didn't recognize my sculpted legs :)
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
The weather is still so nice...
...I just couldn't go any longer without a bike. So I broke down and bought one. I got it used on Craigslist, only lightly used because the guy's wife was too short for the frame. I must say that even though I paid a little over half of what my old bike cost, I definitely upgraded. I LOVE THIS BIKE. I'll probably say that every time I buy a new one (hopefully not too often). I was lucky the Nagys pitched in on this one (thank you!) so it didn't
hurt my pocket too terribly much. I bought it at 11:30 this morning and have been riding around all day doing errands, playing in the park, enjoying summer. It's light and fast! I almost don't want a rack on it to keep the lightness, but carrying all my stuff around in a backpack gets kinda bulky and sweaty. We'll see.
hurt my pocket too terribly much. I bought it at 11:30 this morning and have been riding around all day doing errands, playing in the park, enjoying summer. It's light and fast! I almost don't want a rack on it to keep the lightness, but carrying all my stuff around in a backpack gets kinda bulky and sweaty. We'll see.
Monday, July 28, 2008
Just when I thought the worst was over...
My beautiful new bike (and my old vintage bike) were both stolen from my back porch late Thursday night. I've never been robbed before, and let me tell you... it SUCKS. I sure am glad I registered it, and I filed a police report. But realistically I probably will never see it again. I'm really feeling sore about it. It was the most expensive thing I ever bought, and I had added all sorts of accessories. In the month that I owned it (so short!), I had already ridden hundreds of miles. It is a great freedom getting away from using my car. But thank goodness I have a car now that my bikes are no more.
My landlords and I think we know who took them, because a transient-type guy has been snooping around during the last week. Then, on Saturday night my landlord's lawnmower and our neighbor's mower were stolen. And sometime during the day Sunday, he came back for the carpenter's power sanders. My landlord has taken to carrying a wooden bat around, he even taped up one end so he doesn't get splinters while beating the crap out of our prowler. I suggested setting bear traps.
I also am getting a security home alarm system hooked up in my apartment in case this thief (or anyone else) decides to escalate to breaking in. I only have one door, so I'd feel more safe if some crazy alarms went off to bring Jeff and Susan running down while the cops are on the way. Hopefully that will never happen, of course.
Otherwise life is good. I'm taking advantage of my unemployment to hike, camp, and play while it's nice out. I'm really bonding nicely with my new ultimate team, and spending lots of time with my college buddy Ian who also lives out here. Dad came and had a really fun visit. We hiked and camped out in the Columbia River Gorge along Eagle Creek.
We saw some great waterfalls and had fun roughing it a little. Two weeks ago I climbed to the top of Mount St. Helens. Wow! Was that ever the most amazing feat of my life! It was brutal and wonderful. Click on the panorama photos I pasted together to get a better look. Two days after that, I rode my bike (sigh) to pick blueberries! and enjoy the beach on Sauvie Island in the Columbia River. Overall that ride was about 40 miles! Sunday I did a day hike around Mirror Lake, and up to the summit of Tom, Dick, and Harry Mountain. Great name for a mountain, no? We would have had wonderful views of Mt. Hood, but it was overcast to the point of fogginess. Still beautiful, though.
My landlords and I think we know who took them, because a transient-type guy has been snooping around during the last week. Then, on Saturday night my landlord's lawnmower and our neighbor's mower were stolen. And sometime during the day Sunday, he came back for the carpenter's power sanders. My landlord has taken to carrying a wooden bat around, he even taped up one end so he doesn't get splinters while beating the crap out of our prowler. I suggested setting bear traps.
I also am getting a security home alarm system hooked up in my apartment in case this thief (or anyone else) decides to escalate to breaking in. I only have one door, so I'd feel more safe if some crazy alarms went off to bring Jeff and Susan running down while the cops are on the way. Hopefully that will never happen, of course.
Otherwise life is good. I'm taking advantage of my unemployment to hike, camp, and play while it's nice out. I'm really bonding nicely with my new ultimate team, and spending lots of time with my college buddy Ian who also lives out here. Dad came and had a really fun visit. We hiked and camped out in the Columbia River Gorge along Eagle Creek.
We saw some great waterfalls and had fun roughing it a little. Two weeks ago I climbed to the top of Mount St. Helens. Wow! Was that ever the most amazing feat of my life! It was brutal and wonderful. Click on the panorama photos I pasted together to get a better look. Two days after that, I rode my bike (sigh) to pick blueberries! and enjoy the beach on Sauvie Island in the Columbia River. Overall that ride was about 40 miles! Sunday I did a day hike around Mirror Lake, and up to the summit of Tom, Dick, and Harry Mountain. Great name for a mountain, no? We would have had wonderful views of Mt. Hood, but it was overcast to the point of fogginess. Still beautiful, though.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
and the livin's easy...more or less
The weathermen are predicting four straight days of temperatures in the mid nineties! It has already been so lovely outside, my tan is even coming back. After 8 months of wintry yuckiness, it's about time summer shows up!
Lots of fun (and not so great) big changes have been taking place in my life.
I bought a really nice bicycle so I can cut down on using my car, get in shape, and fit in with all of the other Portland citizens. It's a Trek, and I souped it up with fenders, a rear rack, and a cute little bell that I ring all too often. I'm already riding it all over town, and loving every minute of it.
I am officially not accepted into the graduate program, as classes began this Monday.
The manager at Planned Parenthood that promised me a job, gave the position away to another applicant because she is obligated to give priority to applicants from within the company. I was furious, then hurt, now just dejected. On top of it, I had already quit my other job for this. I really thought I was a shoe-in. But she is forwarding my resume to the other health centers around town and personally calling all of the managers to talk me up to them and get me interviews.
I played in an Ultimate frisbee tournament last weekend in Estacada, OR called Logjam with a really great team and had an absolute blast. I have joined a co-ed summer league team here in town (less competitive, more social). Our first game is tonight, and our jerseys are pink!
My best bud in the whole Pacific Northwest is moving to New Haven, CT tomorrow morning to attend Yale's nurse midwifery program. I hate that I'm losing her. I'm on my way to her house to help her pack up her car for the long trip.
So some sadness and bad luck, but all in all - I am loving summer sooo much!!!! I feel a hundred times happier and healthier than I did all winter. Now we just have to get dad and Julia to come see my new town. Mama and I had a really nice visit last month. Ciao for now.
Lots of fun (and not so great) big changes have been taking place in my life.
I bought a really nice bicycle so I can cut down on using my car, get in shape, and fit in with all of the other Portland citizens. It's a Trek, and I souped it up with fenders, a rear rack, and a cute little bell that I ring all too often. I'm already riding it all over town, and loving every minute of it.
I am officially not accepted into the graduate program, as classes began this Monday.
The manager at Planned Parenthood that promised me a job, gave the position away to another applicant because she is obligated to give priority to applicants from within the company. I was furious, then hurt, now just dejected. On top of it, I had already quit my other job for this. I really thought I was a shoe-in. But she is forwarding my resume to the other health centers around town and personally calling all of the managers to talk me up to them and get me interviews.
I played in an Ultimate frisbee tournament last weekend in Estacada, OR called Logjam with a really great team and had an absolute blast. I have joined a co-ed summer league team here in town (less competitive, more social). Our first game is tonight, and our jerseys are pink!
My best bud in the whole Pacific Northwest is moving to New Haven, CT tomorrow morning to attend Yale's nurse midwifery program. I hate that I'm losing her. I'm on my way to her house to help her pack up her car for the long trip.
So some sadness and bad luck, but all in all - I am loving summer sooo much!!!! I feel a hundred times happier and healthier than I did all winter. Now we just have to get dad and Julia to come see my new town. Mama and I had a really nice visit last month. Ciao for now.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Jewelrypalooza
Hey friends and fam,
Check out my etsy shop !
Etsy is a website for crafters to sell their handmade items. Everything from jewelry to clothes, dolls to cards, magnets to purses. It's great!
Thanks.
Check out my etsy shop !
Etsy is a website for crafters to sell their handmade items. Everything from jewelry to clothes, dolls to cards, magnets to purses. It's great!
Thanks.
Saturday, April 5, 2008
Spring is here, more or less...
In a few minutes I'm going to my friend's house for a craft night. I'm trying to decide whether to crochet, cross-stitch, draw, or make jewelry. Gee, I'm crafty!
Life in limbo is actually pretty good. By limbo I mean that OHSU has placed me on the waitlist - so I can potentially be accepted anytime between tomorrow and mid-June, or not at all. Also in limbo - we are between grants with the doula group, so I have no births going on right now. But I have been called back in for a second interview at a restaurant downtown because they were "very impressed" by me.
In the meantime, I've been traveling and reacquainting myself with the outdoors.
I visited Julia for a week, went snowboarding and snowmobiling! It was tons of fun and much needed. Then Lindsey came to Portland for a few days and we drove to Boise to join up with Kathryn for a week of reunited friendliness. We speakerphoned Abby so we could at least share a conversation as the fab four.
I'm finally playing some ultimate frisbee again with a great pick-up team in SE Portland. It feels good (and bad, pant pant pant) to play again. I have to get back into shape so I can keep up. Three hours of casual ultimate with no breaks is tough on this lazy girl!!
I'm also really excited that my mama is finally coming to visit me out here!
I took a hike with some new buddies out in the Columbia Gorge and it was so amazing. I'm in a rainforest, and it's still pretty rainy here, so everything was exceptionally green and the plush moss covered everything. Oh I just loved it!
I posted tons and tons of photos on flickr today, including finally getting up the rest of my cross country trip photos from last spring. Check it out here.
Love!
Life in limbo is actually pretty good. By limbo I mean that OHSU has placed me on the waitlist - so I can potentially be accepted anytime between tomorrow and mid-June, or not at all. Also in limbo - we are between grants with the doula group, so I have no births going on right now. But I have been called back in for a second interview at a restaurant downtown because they were "very impressed" by me.
In the meantime, I've been traveling and reacquainting myself with the outdoors.
I visited Julia for a week, went snowboarding and snowmobiling! It was tons of fun and much needed. Then Lindsey came to Portland for a few days and we drove to Boise to join up with Kathryn for a week of reunited friendliness. We speakerphoned Abby so we could at least share a conversation as the fab four.
I'm finally playing some ultimate frisbee again with a great pick-up team in SE Portland. It feels good (and bad, pant pant pant) to play again. I have to get back into shape so I can keep up. Three hours of casual ultimate with no breaks is tough on this lazy girl!!
I'm also really excited that my mama is finally coming to visit me out here!
I took a hike with some new buddies out in the Columbia Gorge and it was so amazing. I'm in a rainforest, and it's still pretty rainy here, so everything was exceptionally green and the plush moss covered everything. Oh I just loved it!
I posted tons and tons of photos on flickr today, including finally getting up the rest of my cross country trip photos from last spring. Check it out here.
Love!
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